Lauf Sticks One to the “Man” With Name Change
The Belleville
Black Knights, the target of numerous attacks from political do rights, have agreed in principle to a cash settlement with
the Rainbow Coalition, to change the name of their team from the Belleville Black Knights to the Belleville Knights. Terms of the deal were not disclosed, but it is rumored to be a deal that will net
the Knights ownership a high six-figure payoff.
“Jesse Jackson
and his thugs are known for strong arming major corporations, we were not going to let that happen to us”, Keith Lauf
said at a press conference Wednesday night. “He's so drunk with power,
it’s been documented that he went to PepsiCo, threatened them by saying “If you don’t give my friend a Pepsi
distributorship and my organization a cash donation, I will start a boycott of your product", that's just plain extorsion.
Look the name of this
team goes back to my teenage years, it described our uniforms. It has a special
place in my heart so that’s where the term “Black Knights came from. It
has nothing to do with race. Look how many black players are on my team, everyone
should own at least 4 or 5 of them. It’s just another instance of this loser putting his nose where it doesn’t
belong,” Lauf said.
“Our uniforms will still be BLACK, our logo will still be BLACK and I’m looking into painting
the stadium BLACK. Hell, I might look into making our Sunday, home uniform hat
have a BLACK swastika.” What’s great is, we only needed about 1/5
of the payoff to cover the cost to change the logo on our letterhead and uniforms, the rest
of the money will be donated to the National Association Against Reverse Racism, this way Jesse Jackson will have indirectly
donated money to help white people in America”, he said.
League officials
have said, “We did not force the Belleville franchise to make any moves which weren’t warranted. We will support the franchise any way we can. We will not,
however, take part in any of the political mudslinging with either party associated with this issue.
There is no telling
which team this psycho, left wing organization will attack next. It looks like
no one is safe.
Injury Bug Hits Just About Every Team
1b Derrick Lee
3b Chipper Jones
SS Nomar Garciaparra
SS Julio Lugo
SS Ceasar Izturis
OF Ken Griffey
OF Aubry Huff
SP Mark Prior
SP Bartolo Colon
SP CC Sabathia
SP Kerry Wood
SP Adam Eaton
RP Eric Gagne
RP Todd Jones
This lineup could win
the championship in any league. Only it’s not a roster it’s guys
who have been or are on the DL so far this season. Some blame the WBC some say
it’s steroids. Whatever it is it’s hurting XFBL teams to the core.
The Holy Rollers have
lost all three of their closers. They have tallied 0 saves so far this season.
The Sox have lost Julio
Lugo and have no capable back up. They have been looking to make a move via the
trade market.
The Hitmen have seen
their top 2 pitchers go on the DL. And it doesn’t help when the rest of
their pitchers hold the highest WHIP and ERA and the lowest amount of wins so far this year.
They have also lost two starters offensively.
The biggest name to
go down so far is, by far, the Knights’ 1B Derrick Lee. He collided with
Rafael Furcal as Furcal was trying to beat out an infield grounder and Lee was trying to cover first. Lee is out 8-10 weeks. Owner Keith Lauf said “We definitely
hate to lose a player the caliber of Derrick but we have Mike Cameron coming off the DL and Jim Thome playing utility. We’ll move him to first and Cameron will move to utility.
Once again the DL list includes the name Ken Griffey. This time it’s
a strained tendon in his right knee.
Younger Players Stand Out During Opening Month
The biggest surprise
so far this year has been the Hitmen’s 1b Chris Shelton. He is hitting
a whopping .426 with 9 home runs and 18 RBI’s in 61 AB’s. Shelton
was a 33rd round pick of MLB Pittsburgh Pirates in the 2001 draft, out of Utah.
The former Ute is hitting a home run every 6.77 at bats. And broke the record for most total bases to open up a season.
Quietly Johnny Gomes is giving Tampa Bay something in baseball to be proud of.
He is hitting .308 with 7 home runs, 16 RBI’s and 15 Runs scored. Those numbers are done in only 52 AB’s. Gomes was drafted 15 rounds higher than Shelton by the D-Rays in the same 2001 draft.
Players who are in the XFBL minor
leagues with notable performances are:
Knights
RP Jonathan Papelbon -7 Saves and 0 earned runs in 8 IP.
Sox
RP Chris Ray
- 1 win, 5 Saves, 0 ER, 0.545 WHIP
Hitmen
SP Scott Kazmir - 2 Wins 23 K’s in 24 1/3 IP
Lizards OF Nick Swisher - .321, 6 HR, 13 RBI, 11 Runs
Outlaws OF Brad Hawpe - .352, 4 HR, 13 RBI, 9 Runs
Holy Rollers 1B Prince Fielder - .383, 2 HR, 10 RBI, 8 Runs
Bangers OF Curtis Granderson - .295, 3 HR, 2 SB, 6 RBI, 11 Runs
